My First “Proper” Job

As you might know I’ve had a few different types of jobs since I turned 16. I think I’ve worked in most industries, which would surprise most people as I’m only 21. I thought I’d tell you about my first “proper” job. By proper job I mean, Monday – Friday 40 hours a week.  This was an apprenticeship in business and administration, I was working as a receptionist at a doctors surgery. I’m not going to lie this was my favourite job, I’ve ever had.

I loved all the drama that happened daily at the surgery, everyday was an emotional roller-coaster, I was 19 while working there. I felt like I was really growing in to the role, I new how to handle the high pressured environment, I have always been fascinated by illness. That sounds really disturbed, but I have an un-diagnosed illness that has affected me my whole life, and health has grown into an obsession for me. The NHS was a great opportunity to learn the ins and out of every day life. I gained so many interchangeable skills, the dealing with difficult patients training is something that I still use every day.

However while this all sounds positive, because of this job i grew as a person, not for the best reasons.  I wasn’t always treated as member of the team, when I was working with the big reception team at the larger surgery I often felt unwelcome and was left to do the jobs that meant I was up in a corner on a different floor alone. Which is okay I’m happy to be on my own, but it’s nice to talk to people occasionally.

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Another bad point of this job was for me that I lived at the opposite side of the city and I couldn’t drive. I we’re travelling 3 hours a day to and from work. I left in the dark and came home in the dark. It made me  feel disconnected from real life. I’m sure lots of people do this, but I stuck it out for 7 months.

Finally, the reason that I grew some balls, figuratively. After 6 months I felt like I growing into the team, I wasn’t hidden away anymore, I had my own responsibilities. I really felt like I had settled in. Then one day we was talking as a group about the team, and people who were leaving. Then one of my colleagues said something along the lines of “no offence, Billie, but we’re talking about the team, not you. You’re the apprentice you are not a member of the team”. I snapped on the inside. I covered for everyone so much, I took the blame for things because I was the youngest and the apprentice I’d get a stern telling off then things would blow over all to protect my “team”. In that instance I stopped caring. I had my driving test a few days later, which I failed. On my way back to work, I swung by a recruitment agency and had got myself there starting the next month. I walking in to the surgery, wrote my notice. On my leaving interview, I said I’m leaving because I’m not a member of the team.

Off I went. I stopped letting people walk over me, started a new job, had new dramas, which is a whole other character building post for another day. Its been two years since I worked in the NHS, and I’m not going to lie. I couldn’t be happier. Don’t stand for anyone not making you feel welcome. Try your absolute best at everything and trust yourself. Take chances and learn for yourself.

I know this was a big lots of words post. If you’d like to know about my other jobs let me know, some of them were pretty crazy.

billie xox

Find more of me at http://billiegeena.co.uk/

So I disappeared again.

Hey girl, hey.  So I have disappeared for a little while again and I thought I’d let you know why.

Mainly I’ve not been here because I feel ill all of the time. I have an undiagnosed stomach problem that I’ve had forever but sometimes it flares up and makes me feel like death. I have been referred to the hospital again but I’ve had to wait 4 months until an appointment and I’ve got another month to go.  So that’s the biggest player in not been as social

Then I have my busy, crazy and weird life. I work in recruitment so I am stressed at least 300% of the time. When I’m feeling well I tend to be at an event. I have so many to write up for all of you. yaay!

I’ve also spent way too much time with 4 of my favourite people who are also Sheffield bloggers we’ve been planning the #steelcityblogmeet for 6 months now and its so close to the event. Which brings to to reason 60 of why I’ve not been blogging.

SOCIAL ANXIETY. I am so freaking nervous and stressed out to a point where the only way I’m not getting worked up is by  sleeping. I’m sure I’ll feel better once the stress of the event is over and I’ll be fine. I know my anxiety so its nothing I can’t work through.

I’m sure your all thinking “gee, that is a lot going on, Bill”.  I’ve had my usual ‘Billie Dramas’ going on as per. I went gluten free. I started eating gluten again. I went on a date that wasn’t a date. I had two car accidents, ish. Boy Drama. My little sister has out grown me. I made a whole branch of a company fall out with me.

If anyone wants more in depth of my dilemmas just ask, I have no secrets just mental scars that will make decent blog posts one day.

We’ve got lots to talk about, dear reader.

billie xox

Find more of me at http://billiegeena.co.uk/